I would like to start by making something clear: Living is not easy, there will always be challenges, problems and unexpected events along the way.
Just those difficulties lead us to be better, that’s where everything makes sense. We come into this world to build our best version and to be happy in the process.
1. To think too much about things
Whether it’s a problem you’re going through or finding yourself at the crossroads of making a decision, thinking too much about something can steal much of your energy. If you can do something, do it, if you can no longer do it, stop worrying and look to the future.
There is nothing more frustrating than turning a situation in our minds that we cannot change. Remember that what you focus on has power. So if you attract negative thoughts to your mind, they are sure to grow. Learn to see an opportunity in every problem.
When it comes to making a decision about something that could bring benefits to your life and you don’t know what to do, and you are constantly thinking about alternatives. I want to give you some advice. People regret more at the end of those things they did not try, than at what they decided to take the step. If you are facing an opportunity and you don’t know if things can go well, try it. How about if it works out? And if things turn out differently than you expected, remember that each failure is an opportunity to learn how to do things better.
There is nothing negative that can result from trying something new. Your thoughts can become tangible things in your world. For this reason, you should consciously search, feed those ideas that can attract positive things to your life. Thinking about the good that can happen to us derived from what we are experiencing today, is the best alternative to build a happier future.
2. Wanting to please everyone
Each person is different, and you should know that it is impossible to please everyone with our decisions. While there are people who will support your dreams and aspirations from the start, there will also be someone who tells you not to. Do not change or hide part of your essence, to like those people with whom it is difficult to get along.
It is important that you know what your dreams, goals and aspirations are. Knowing where you are going will give you much more certainty in the attitudes you should have towards life and your projects. In this way, when you meet someone who does not support your aspirations, you will be able to defend your ideas and stick to your vision of them. Remember that it is your life and that you are in control. Someone’s opinion should never be enough reason to leave your dreams. Stop thinking about pleasing everyone, and start by pleasing yourself. If you feel happy and peaceful, then you are on the right track.
3. Complain all day
It is normal for things that are beyond our control to happen daily. Situations that lead us to fall into despair, anger or helplessness. It is an inevitable evil. So we are left with only two alternatives: learn to deal with such situations and look for the positive in each of them, or regret bitterly all day and use these complaints as a placebo for our feelings.
Complaining is only a way to dampen our negative feelings about something that is out of our control. But what we don’t notice is that it usually brings with it more discomfort and frustration. We want to generate empathy, feel consolation and the support of others, putting ourselves in the place of victims.
The problem is that complaining constantly locks us in a circle where action never comes. We become unable to solve, and we continue to feed the idea that we have been wronged, to feel the comfort and support of other people.
The key is to ask ourselves what we can do about a problem, rather than concentrating on the feeling of discomfort that it generates in itself. Focusing on solutions takes us to a level where we can grow and learn. In the event that you are no longer able to do something, you must accept it and shift your focus to something else. Complaining constantly will lead to unhappiness. Don’t let a bad time ruin the rest of your day. Look for the positive in each situation and be grateful for those good things that are happening in your life. Gratitude opens the door to more prosperity, while complaint only pigeonholes and limits.
4. Pretend everything is fine
Not all can be perfect. As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, life is not easy, in fact, its complexity makes it an exciting path and continuous opportunities for growth and development. We must accept that sooner or later things are going to get difficult, it is inevitable. Someone who refuses to accept that something is wrong is also closed to the possibility of finding a solution. Accepting that something requires our attention is the first step in correcting it. So once those difficult moments arrive we must be alert to find the solution as soon as possible. We are human beings and it is normal that we are wrong, or that things are not always as we expect. Admit your mistakes, your complications and your failures, they are part of your history. Difficult moments in your life are necessary to forge a better version of yourself in the future.
5. Live the life of others
Don’t pretend to live someone else’s life. Today, through social media, it is common to be aware of the successes and achievements of many people. You will always find someone who seems to have accomplished better than you. You will see people traveling and enjoying life as if everything seemed perfect.
First of all, it is important to mention that no one is going to reveal the worst of their life to the world. We are in constant need of acceptance and recognition, so it is normal that we only project the best of ourselves.
The reality is that we all have complications, problems and difficulties. Don’t concern yourself where you live or how much money you have. There will always be something you would rather not happen to you. Comparing our lives with someone else’s is unnecessary and will not bear fruit. Don’t compare your number 1 chapter to someone else’s chapter 10. We are so many human beings on this planet, that it is completely normal that the living conditions of one person to another are totally different. The only human being you should compare yourself to is yourself. If you measure your results and notice that there is progress, you will know that you are doing things the right way.
6. Argue nonsense
Unnecessary discussions steal too much energy. One of the biggest problems in this regard is that for many people there is a need to always be right. We must encourage debate and leave discussions behind. The first of them helps to broaden points of view and generate more growth, while discussions become a dead end, where both parties seek to be correct. If you are right about something, prove it with facts and leave the discussions behind.
7. Live in the past
Everything that happened in your past has only one function: to help you be better. If you are not meeting that goal, then you carry an unnecessary burden in your life. When we are tied to situations in our past, we limit our progress. These barriers are not only due to negative situations, even the old glories may be limiting your future achievements.
Living in the problems of the past is forcing yourself to repeat that situation in your mind over and over again. You must be clear that time will pass anyway, so it is better if you focus on getting the best out of that event and simply enjoying your present.
These attitudes will undoubtedly lead to unhappiness. Eliminating them from your life will not happen overnight, it takes time and determination. You must be honest with yourself and be open to identifying what negative attitudes are hurting you. Recognizing what is wrong is usually the first step in solving.